30 Years Later
It’s almost thirty years later and only now do I feel like I have a grasp on who she was and what her death—and her life—meant to me.
Aftermath: Pets I Have Known (Grieving Futures)
Dealing with the pets after my parents died was just the beginning of my realization that grief was not just something that hit me at night, in the dark under the covers: it reached out into every mundane aspect of my life.
Aftermath: Waste Disposal (Grieving Futures)
I did not realize that when a person dies, their body does not magically disintegrate a lá Obi Wan Kenobi in Star Wars. Let this be a lesson to young adults everywhere: do not base your conception of reality on your favorite movie…
Aftermath: Logistics (Grieving Futures)
It is easy to just do something when a person dies, because there is certainly enough to do…
Reflection: Myths & Histories (Grieving Futures)
That is my Troy. My childhood is nothing but transitory pieces of brittle paper and tape that, when gone, will leave no trace of us, of my family.
Circumstances (Grieving Futures)
I often relive moments of destruction. I cannot call them moments of fear or sadness or even grief, which, as words, fail to convey the feeling of being emotionally shattered. Destruction, on the other hand, is perfect. It beats you down for no reason and makes your heart thump wildly and painfully while you try to breathe.
Introduction, 2010 (Grieving Futures)
I am slowly posting the entirety of Grieving Futures: Surviving the Deaths of My Parents, here on Patience & Fortitude for free. You can still buy the book if you would like (doing so helps support my writing!). I am doing this to make it as available as possible...
Preface to the Original Edition (2010)
This book was fifteen years in the making, even if in the end it took several months of intense writing and editing and reliving the past to make it happen.
Under the Desk
I don't remember much about the time I spent living under my father’s desk. I have snatches of memory, here and there: crawling under it; getting out from under it to feed the dogs and myself; deciding that taking a pillow under there with me was allowed (giving...
Grieving Futures: Preface to the Third Edition (2017)
I am slowly posting the entirety of Grieving Futures: Surviving the Deaths of My Parents, here on Patience & Fortitude for free.
The Forgetting
How am I supposed to feel about not recognizing my mother's name? I don't know. It was so shocking to hear it that I originally thought, Somebody has my last name? Hmm, that name is familiar…is there another York family in this congregation? Then I progressed on...
Tragedy changes us; Patience tempers us; Fortitude keeps us going.
Lessons in grief, crisis, and recovery from 30 years of life as an adult orphan from a GenX woman who has resentfully struggled every step of the way.
